


It’s Okay (To Not Be Strong)

by AnimationFans



Category: Aldnoah.Zero (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Canon divergence: Alternate Ending, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-Slash, Slaine is placed under Inaho's custody after the war, Sleep Deprivation, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-11-02 21:22:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10952976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnimationFans/pseuds/AnimationFans
Summary: Inaho looks so young and vulnerable without the composed look he usually wears on his face. And then it suddenly hits Slaine that Inaho is even a year younger than him and he wants to let out a bitter chuckle. Look at them, barely even adults and they already have so many burdens and scars. But it’s alright, it’s okay to not be strong. They will overcome this together.





	It’s Okay (To Not Be Strong)

            It’s been five days since the war ended, three days since Slaine woke up on a hospital bed and being told that he was placed under Inaho’s custody and one day since Slaine finally moved into Inaho’s home. It’s actually ironic that he is placed under a house arrest when he is already determined to face his death. Inaho looks worse for wear too, he mentions something about removing an analytical engine but something else must be going on, if the bags under his eyes indicate anything. Well, it’s not any of Slaine’s concern anyway, Inaho can take care of himself.

            Slaine’s assumption is wrong for once. When he wakes up in the middle of the night to get a cup of water, he notices Inaho is still in the living room, sorting out his documents and typing away on his tablet. Despite himself, Slaine retorts: “What are you doing up at this hour?” Inaho looks up a little surprised at the sudden conversation because Slaine hasn’t responded to his efforts of conversations since he moved in. He merely shrugs and says: “There’s a meeting tomorrow morning and I need to have these documents organized.” Slaine notices that a hint of fatigue is laced under his voice. He doesn’t pay it much notice, just huffs and leaves.

             If Slaine thinks that night is just a rare occurrence, he’s wrong once again. Everything seems to go downhill from there on. He notices that Inaho would go to work early and come back late at night, and before going to work he would prepare all three meals for Slaine beforehand. Even after coming home, Inaho busies himself with work, house chores or do some new research on his tablet. _This is getting ridiculous_ , Slaine thinks to himself when he finds Inaho lounged in the living room once again for the eighth night in a row. “Do you even sleep?” “Yes, what makes you think that I don’t?” “Forget that I ever ask.” Slaine retreats to his bedroom and waits. He’s going to find out what’s going on no matter what.

             It seems like ages before Slaine looks at the living room again. Inaho has finally gone back to his room and to Slaine’s surprise, his door is slightly left ajar. Is the lack of sleep finally catching up with him that he even forgets to lock his door? When Slaine’s is still pondering about this, he hears a dull thud inside the room and rushes in without second thought. Inaho is on the floor, harshly jarred awake by his fall and his condition is not good. He is trying very hard to control his breathing but Slaine can tell that he’s hyperventilating. He’s trembling slightly and his face looks even paler than usual.

 _Nightmares_ , Slaine immediately concludes, having a fair share of them himself, even though they have decreased surprisingly after he moved into Inaho’s house. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he knows that’s because living here gives him a sense of normality and even the feeling of _home_. He is under house arrest but Inaho never treats him like a prisoner. He isn’t required to do any work, free to do what he wants and never once feels suffocated like when he was at Mars. Inaho also tries to strike up a conversation and initiate interaction with him whenever he has the chance so that he would not feel the solidarity of house arrest. They are enemies, Slaine vaguely reminds himself, but deep down he has always understand that they are on different side of wars and they did what they had to protect the people whom they cherished.

             Slaine crouches beside Inaho and soothes: “Hey, calm down, that’s just a dream. It isn’t real.” Inaho nods slightly, breathing already not as erratic as before. “Do you want to talk about it?” “It isn’t something serious. It will take some time but sooner or later it will go away.” “You know that is not an option. Your condition won’t allow you to hang on till that time.” Inaho seems to relent before asking: “You think I am a monster, don’t you?” Slaine visibly blanches but before he can say anything, Inaho murmurs: “I am not, even though many people would think so. Maybe it’s the duty of protecting my family and friends preventing me from feeling too much remorse when I eradicated the enemies. But they are there, and now when finally the war has ended, these feelings come back with a vengeance. It’s my penalty.”

             Slaine is a little surprised to see him say so many words at once. He offers comfort without thinking: “I can stay here with you if you want? Two people make it easier to handle these nightmares.” He wants to bite off his tongue when he notices how intrusive and awkward that offer is. However, Inaho seems to give that matter a thought and nods: “If you are okay with it?” “I wouldn’t have offer if I am not fine with it.”

             Inaho settles back onto his bed and Slaine takes the space beside him. Inaho must be really exhausted (which is understandable, considering the situation he is in) because he falls asleep almost immediately after he mumbles out a goodnight. He looks so young and vulnerable without the composed look he usually wears on his face. And then it suddenly hits Slaine that Inaho is even a year younger than him and he wants to let out a bitter chuckle. Look at them, barely even adults and they already have so many burdens and scars. But it’s alright, it’s okay to not be strong. They will overcome this together. They have all the time in the world. With this thought, he finally falls into a slumber.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my third work for Aldnoah Zero. I hope you guys like it!


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